My Story

               Drugged up as a Child ; stripped of my sexuality as a Man

I was born in London, England. Luckily fit and healthy. I had a troublesome period with my OCD and Tourrettes Syndrome at 9 years old. Regardless I was luckily fit and healthy. The local (NHS) doctors and child psychiatrists told my mum they were experts and various SSRI's & Anti-Psychotics were the right and safe thing to do. They didn't inform her of the dangers and the drug companies have since court cases, for every single drug they put me on, did not fully inform the doctors or side effect leaflets. Covering serious ones up in trials.

I was at 9 years old put into one of the many disturbed children mental homes with routine padded cells restraining for all. You go loopy on the medications. Lots of adults sit on you until you give up. We were generally all locked in one room.

The Padded Cell 
"The cosy room"

I was made to routinely watch a drug company propaganda DVD that lectured with no proof or test that there was something wrong with my brain. That my brain doesn't fire serotonin properly so I had to take these drug companies pills for the rest of my life to keep it corrected.

(GSK fined $3billion by US government for things like "GSK, one of the world's largest healthcare and pharmaceuticals companies,admitted to promoting antidepressants Paxil and Wellbutrin for unapproved uses, including treatment of children and adolescents.")

It didn't work but made me hormonally crazy as well. I overdosed at 12 and up in hospital. Nobody suggested that the crazy drugs might have something to do with it. Despite all of this, BBC Panaromas "The Secrets of Seroxat", being old news. That trial is still going on to this day in the hope that the families will give up and run out of money. I went home and continued taking it like normal. Pill pop breakfast, lunch, dinner.

The only time it would help my tics is if I was irritable from the withdrawal of missing a drug dose!

Also consequently wasting time out of school (work with mum or dad), the large special needs school dustbin (no GCSE's). Travelling all the way across to the opposite end of London through the traffic. I spent half the time there running away, then more mental institutions.

At 19 the adult mental outpatient clinic, they add a "something of a wonder drug for people" (see Panoramas "who's paying your doctor", CPD training points) (Neurontin guilty US Justice $430million fine) Gaba Disrupter (later edit: actually it was the related Lyrica, one that drug addicts are dying in epidemic numbers in now ) on top of my serotonin and dopamine disrupters ("anti-depressants "and "anti-psychotics" to me and you). I didn't realize but my genitals gradually became numb, I thought maybe it's the shower. I was concurrently sidetracked also by some unexpected flooring chest and stomach attacks. No doctor done all that much. I was advised at the walk-in center I should have a scan legally due to my young age and it being near my heart. Never mind all these medications... No such scan was ever done.

I persevered. I was just happy to finally be free from special needs and institutions with my job and my flat. By 21 it was all over. Total no natural sexual arousal response of mine, horror-filled numb genitals, my intestines painfully shredded up and malabsorbtion of food.

The doctors sent me in circles. They had no idea what they were doing.

Heres where the apparent NHS sale of my organs gets comical

Psychiatrist "what did the doctor say?"
Doctor "what did the psychiatrist say?"
Psychiatrist "what did the doctor say?"
Doctor "what did the psychiatrist say?"

this goes on for a while until they admit its the medication but everything will go back to normal. come off the medication (with no procedure or guidance there). MY body did not go back to normal. however in between this fasrcicle continued:

My prolactins high "don't worry everyone on anti-pshycotics prolactin is high" yeah it would have been nice if you didn't withhold that from my mum when I was 9 years old (thats a gland in my brain by the way, the Pituatary Gland) (hyperprolactinemia). It stayed high so they were about to send me for a brain tumor scan. At this point i was wondering what I was going to do with my final days at 21. Then the doctor almost hit the computer as he screw faced it like an alien had landed on his desk from mars "that doesn't make any sense!". My Prolactin this late eventually went down but now the screen said I had hypothyroidism messed up thyroid hormone levels. So now he started to explain "it's perfectly treatable" all you have to do is take thyroxine for the rest of your life.  I was so tired but I exercised and ran like crazy, the next time it was "normal blood levels computer". An endocrinologist or any fool that looks up the endocrine system and thyroid disorders online could have discovered in 2 seconds that the pituitary instructs the thyroid how much hormones to produces. But Anyhoo

To think I have never received blood checkups whilst on the heavy drugs since 9 is also scary. I realized these self-professed experts had totally hijacked my young body for cash, my hell awakening. I was in hell. I had stopped taking the medicine. A worse cold turkey hell insued for over a year and a half with brain electro zaps (and more here) and head tearing hypervigilance, inability to concentrate and unreal brain damage like anxiety. I had a major uncontrollable arousal and ejaculations kickback during this withdrawal period. After that it went back to dead. A little even more dead.

The doctors changed there story amnesia like once I still had the permanent damages that weren't going away but my bloods showed nothing brain tumor-ish anymore. Going with the NHS trained quote "medications have no permanent damage after 3 months. It's impossible". They blamed my record of mental health history (Joanna Moncrieff interview - Pshyciatrist and head of phsyciatry department at UCL university) from then on off an ocd diagnosis from when I was 9 years old as the proof that I was just crazy and I should just take more of their drugs and go away. Never failing to finish without the ultimate insult.

 "when did you last see your psychiatrist".

It would have been nice if I only had to keep that on a mug or a t-shirt. Instead I have to keep their permanent organ damages around with me.

While they run round happy families. Maybe I should send them a mug. It would be more accurate.

reference:  on the brain zaps withdrawal symptom

Skipping a dose: If you are on a medication and you accidentally miss or intentionally skip a dose, you may notice unpleasant brain zaps. When people experience the zap sensation, they quickly remember that they forgot to take their medication."

Orwells 1984 mind control suddenly springs to mind. This is sick.


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